Everything you really need to know about what happened at the Oscars

I didn’t watch the Academy Awards, but here, according to Twitter, were the highlights:

Anne Hathaway‘s nipples joined her on the red carpet.

The general consensus seems to be that Renee Zellweger was on something.

Kristen Stewart was on crutches.

Adele was amazing.

Nicole Kidman‘s forehead didn’t move.

Barbra Streisand sang.

Michelle Obama stopped by.

And people love to make fun of the Oscars.